Beauty Pixelated

My Date (1)

This is a sequel to my earlier blog on my strange illness.

Read it here.

All names/places are fictitious and bear no resemblance to any thing remotely real.

Kolkata, some Saturday in March 2009, after the mid semester exams

Behka Main Behka, Woh Behki Hawa Si Aai..

Ek Hi Nazar Mein Sab, Manzil Wanzil Paaye...

"Shut the phone up and LET ME SLEEP in peace! It's only 11 o' clock!!" shouted my room-mate from under the covers. I hit the snooze button before I had realized what time it was...

Behka Main Behka, Woh Behki ..

"Aarav !!! See the time dude !! What time is your date? " yelled my roomie again. This time I woke up. Date. Something clicked. I had a date at 12 pm! I glanced at my phone and saw that I was late, it was already 11:30 am !

At this point, I should make something clear. This was the first time I was going to meet her, the person who had changed me. She was the whiff of fresh air in my life - the girl whom you feel is just the one for you.

"Get out of bed idiot! Now rush or you will be late... I don't want you to be late again!!" It seemed that my roomie was more enthusiastic in this whole thing than me. I got out of my bed, rushed through the morning chores at a dastardly late hour (though it is quite common in a hostel to see someone brushing his teeth at 4 o' clock in the evening) and rushed out towards my long quest towards the city. And like a true conqueror, I set out for my prize with hope in my heart and enthusiasm in my gait. The date was at one of the malls of Kolkata - city center.

Tweet Tweet . My phone beeped.

"1 NEW MESSAGE"

Hey.. u coming na ??

I guessed it was more of a rhetorical question, she knew I would be there. However some furious thumbing later:-

"Please Recharge Your Account to Resume Services"

Oh shit! What if she decides not to come over when she doesn't receive my sms? Hell, I had to do something! Thankfully my over enthusiastic roomie had (some) balance, a rare instance, and I texted an affirmative. I reached CCD @ CC and started waiting... my past experience told me girls seldom turn up in time. After a Cappuccino and a Tropical Iceberg later, as my wallet steadily emptied itself, I started cursing my luck. And then I saw her...

"Shall I compare thee to a summer's day? Thou art more lovely and more temperate: Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May, And summer's lease hath all too short a date."

Now I understood what Shakespeare must have felt when he penned those lines. She was the epitome of the Greek goddess, the muse of painters and poets. The sinuous tresses of her hair overflowed onto her shoulders nonchalantly, yet gracefully. Mere words cannot express the volumes spoken by her mysterious eyes. Someone had rightly said beauty is an experience, it is not a fixed pattern or arrangement of features. It is something which is felt, and I felt her beauty radiating all around me. I stood there speechless, my mind blank.

"Hey Aarav !! So finally we meet! I am so happyyyyy! "

*smiling like an angel*

Finally I managed to speak.

"I am even happier than you dear!!! So Eisha... how did you recognize me ??? "

An awkward silence for a second

"Eisha? Who Eisha? You don't even remember my name ???"

*sob*

"Aarav.. I never expected this from you. I am leaving. Please do not ever try to contact me or call me, ever again"

*sob*

I always had trouble remembering names. :(

~~~~~

P.S :- Aarav is the name of the main character in all my blogs from now on. I got some really nasty feeback from my last post in which I had used my own name, which I had to delete.

P.S :- This is totally fictitious.

P.S :- Or is it?

P.S :- Really missing iiser

P.S :- She still won't talk with me. :( :(

P.S :- The doodle is from www.themattefinish.com

Smileys

Smileys

People are using a lot of smileys these days... and I think that the excessive use of smileys stems from seeing too much of Ekta Kapoors's soaps. I think I have made my point clear.. don't you think so ? Nowhere else apart from the gross sets of ekta's soaps do you find people emoting so much!!! People are becoming irrational while using smileys, often rendering the whole point of using them insane. For example, I was chatting with one of my friends who had f*cked up his results this semester.

Me: Aur bhai !! Results kaisa raha ?

(By the way, I already knew it)

He: Yaar.. bahut gandi hai.. *expletives* :) :( :) :( :D :D

wtf !! He wants to smile, grin and be sad , all at the same time ?

More :

Me: Hii! wassup ? how r u ?

(trying to be cool by saying wassup.. does it make me cool ?)

She: I am fine!! :D :D :D :P

Now what is so funny in being fine ? Pointless usage of smileys! :D:D:P:(:(

***

PS - I am going to add PS after every post from now onwards. Sad for you !

PS - The credit for the idea goes to Himanshu -> Check out his blog here! He writes really awesome!

PS - I am stuck with a very boring project on the fluoride contamination of ground water. bah!

PS - I really screwed up my last semester. I am finally a 7-pointer.

PS - The girl I like (or rather love...) refuses to talk with me. why ?

Getting Committed

Recently I have been afflicted with a strange illness. Let's call it "i-don’t-want-to-remain-single-anymore-get-me-a-girlfriend-quick" syndrome.

I want to change my status in Social Networking sites to "committed"! But for that, I first need to get committed to a girl. I am calling it a sickness, because this is just a temporary phase, and this miserable feeling of being single would go away soon, I am sure! Right now, all I want is someone whom I would be able to call my girlfriend!

 

Now studying at a college with a negligible female population, what sources do I have to get committed? Now in India, the game of 'Have-You-Met-Ted' will not work, and I am not smart enough to just walk upto any girl and say ‘Hi! Have we met before?’ Practically speaking, it is impossible to talk to any girl out there on the street. We always hear of stories like - "You heard of X? He just found his love at the mall! And now they are dating ..." These fantastic stories only take place in people's fantasies... I have never heard anyone finding their love in a mall! Also, I don’t want to get into a long-distance-relationship, so all ex-schoolmates are removed from the potential list.

So now I am at an alien city, and I have to find the girl of my dreams among the thousands of girls in the city. To start with, I turn to our faithful friend Orkut. I start trawling Orkut for potential matches... but hit roadblocks at every corner. I can't understand why the hell girls can't put up their own pic, atleast in their display photo!!! Girls... please understand, no one is going to morph your tiny display pic into the next big sex scandal of the country! Now the next roadblock - age. Why the hell cant girls put up their age? Next checkpoint - which year in college. Now I have a rule - I will only get into a relationship with a girl, who is in the same year of college as I am. Again, I can never understand why girls can’t just fill out these details in the professional section. But this is taken care of pretty easily... by just going through their communities, it can be found out. Not if they are member of some few odd hundreds of communities!!!

So after spending some time and going through about hundred profiles, I am able to find one or two profiles, which match all the criteria. Now the next big question - What reason do I have to send them a friend request? And how do I make my friend request different from the tens of requests they must be recieving everyday? The answer is nothing can be done. :( 

So eating all shame, and reaching the lowly depths of desperatism (being a desperado) in orkut, keeping no difference between me and the other LoverBoys of Orkut (No, seriously, there is a whole community of these guys out there whose only motive is to send 1000 fraandship requsts to every girl in orkut), I finally send you the friend request! Now I pray I don’t get swept like all those Loverboys of Orkut, and you can see the genuineness of my friend request ! 

More often than not, I get accepted. Now I start chatting, or rather scrapping. It usually goes something like this:

Me: Hi!!! Thanks for accepting my frnd request! How are you?  :)

(wOw !! She is totally into me now!!! This is the girl for me!! Thank you goD!!! )

You: Hi ! me fyn. 

(oh shit. Another moron who want frandsheep)

Me: Oh great :) So what do you do ?

(I already know all about you from your communities.. just answer fast and let us move on ... )

You: 2nd year, blah blah branch, glug-glag college. What do you do ?

(Seriously, one more stupid question and I get this moron out of my list)

Me: I am a 2nd year student of geophysics at IISER Kolkata. 

(smiling)

You: Ohh gr88.. so a scientist eh ?

(Ha.. Moron claims to be a scientist ! )

Me: Yeah, sort of .. Let me tell you one thing.. You look really beautiful in that pic of yours.

(I am totally in love with you dear!!! I think I am going to propose to you in the next few scraps)

You:   :-)

(What a jerk !!!)

Now you have sent the classic conversation stopper, the smiley. Now what the hell do I reply to that? More smileyes?? "lols" ?? ":D :D :D" ?? Or another question and make the whole conversation look like an interview ? 

This is usually how things progress at my end. However, there have been exceptions, where I could chat upto 2-3 days with the same girl. A few times I have even got to the point of calling them up and chatting on the phone. In even rarer cases, I have met with them. But every time, I have made blunders, which have been totally successful in keeping me blissfully single till date! 

More on that later. 

"The love that lasts longest is the love that is never returned" - Somerset Maugham

Urban jungle

I love photographing wildlife and nature. If given a chance, I would love to live in a tree house in a forest. But as luck would have it, I am stuck in a concrete jungle called Kolkata. Here goes some "wildlife shots" of the urban jungle (also called street photography by some people)